English as reconstruction of being

 Miss A lived in a world different from the world I had lived in until then. At first she looked like a very well-bred young lady, but she wasn't from a very wealthy family. Being an only child, she must have been taken care of. As a toddler, she was sent to classes to learn to play the violin, but it didn't seem to last long. In the beginning, there was little conversation. We used to go home together after school because we were going in the same direction, but I can't remember what I was talking about. Perhaps she wanted to make sure I was human being, since I never said anything vulgar.I remember being surprised when she suddenly retorted that she couldn't imagine you peeing. No girl had ever said that before. Miss A was a girl who uttered words from her own delusion. I wondered if the delusion in Miss A and my mind at that time had the same part somewhere.It would have been interesting if I could have asked the question whether we had same kind of illusion. I just ...

It's been exactly one week since my last blog post. In the past week, I made a relatively big decision and put it into action: I had my 96-year-old mother admitted back to “Rouken” ("Rouken" is an abbreviation for a long-term care facility for the elderly. These facilities provide nursing care, care, rehabilitation, and support for daily living under medical supervision by a doctor, with the aim of enabling elderly people who require care to return home. They are primarily intended for short-term stays of 3 to 6 months, with the aim of maintaining and improving physical and mental functions. ＿Summary by AI). I decided to provide home care in the winter after discussing it with my wife because it would be difficult to manage the kerosene heater at my parents' house and it would be a pain to go there every morning and evening. In the end, I was unable to take care of my mother's diaper and had no choice but to rely on my wife, and I felt that the mental burden on my...

I think we need literature to live. This is because the relationships in the real capitalist society have inhuman coercive power. We desperately need stories with warm hearts and dreams. It's okay to live in a dark world and suffer from material poverty, but you can't live without love, so I want there to be at least some love even in the world of novels (art in general). My friend and I once watched a movie about Egon Schiele, a 20th century European painter. Picasso seems to have done the same thing, but I couldn't accept the moral idea that he could change his female models one after another, and that even if the female models suffered from jealousy and were ruined, he could remain calm and think that it was inevitable for his own art. I was of the opinion that real life was more important than art, but my friend was of the opinion that women who become models should be prepared for this to happen before accepting a modeling job. My friend says that's wh...

 As for my personal experience, I would like to self-evaluate my work at a local company for 38 years. I'm sure you'll be amazed that I still thinking about such things now, and that I am still dragging the past forever. You could say that was the only way to survive, and it was something I had endured well. However, at each age, we live our lives only once, at that time. Unfortunately, that irreplaceability was something you didn't experience when you were young. The company I chose has had two full-time employees die and one part-time female employee involved in an accident. One of the deceased was forced to quit his job by his boss, but when his job change did not go as planned, he was cornered and committed suicide. The other person was transferred to an unfamiliar department every few years, became depressed, and eventually died from accidental ingestion at a sanatorium whose expenses were partially given money by the company. A relatively young part-time worker accide...

 Should I fall out of love? My fire in the light To chase a feather in the wind  Within the glow that weaves a cloak of delight There moves a thread that has no end For many hours and days that pass ever soon The tides have caused the flame to dim At last the arm is straight, the hand to the loom Is this to end or just begin? chorus　 Oh, all of my love to you now All of my love, all of my love Oh, all of my love to you now   The cup is raised, the toast is made yet again One voice is clear above the din Proud Aryan one word, my will to sustain For me the cloth once more to spin   chorus All of my love, all of my love Oh, all of my love to you now   All of my love, all of my love Yes, all of my love to you, child   Yours is the cloth, mine is the hand that sows time His is the force that lies within Ours is the fire, all the warmth we can find   He is a feather in the wind   chorus All of my love, all of my love Oh, all of my love to you now  ...

  私自身の英語学習と備忘録のためにこれを掲載させていただく。 Vice President Vance, Speaker Johnson, Senator Thune, Chief Justice Roberts, justices of the Supreme Court of the United States, President Clinton, President Bush, President Obama, President Biden, Vice President Harris, and my fellow citizens, the golden age of America begins right now. (Applause.)   From this day forward, our country will flourish and be respected again all over the world. We will be the envy of every nation, and we will not allow ourselves to be taken advantage of any longer. During every single day of the Trump administration, I will, very simply, put America first. (Applause.)   Our sovereignty will be reclaimed. Our safety will be restored. The scales of justice will be rebalanced. The vicious, violent, and unfair weaponization of the Justice Department and our government will end. (Applause.)   And our top priority will be to create a nation that is proud, prosperous, and free. (Applause.) America will so...

  I want to achieve something through writing. I want to secure a space where I can breathe freely, think and imagine, record and comment. By "free," I mean isolated from the realities of my present life or my status. I can be anything "there" and start anywhere. For example, I could start with a travelogue of my trip to Spain, or I could just organize and sort out the things that are bothering me right now, or I could reflect on the past month and write about new work ideas. Until now, I've written these things freely in the form of a "diary" (although it can't really be called a diary, since I don't write every day). Perhaps by writing down my existence, I objectified myself in the writing and was meeting that objectified version of myself. What I'm trying to write now is not "free" but "achievement." In other words, it's intended to prepare me for the future and cultivate a sense of ambition. Yes, I want to develo...

  I've thought of you again. Your modest wish. Of course, it's nothing. Why don't you want more? Not greedy,  with just a little progress  Your small satisfaction brings me to tears. I wonder why, it always does. You're so lovely, so pure, Your thoughts touch my heart. When I forget about you and become obsessed with big things. When I stumble and hang my head. You look at me with a strange expression. An ordinary life, unconscious of my own lack of desire for more. Is it a waste of time to imagine that history is building up behind it? Is it a waste of time to imagine that improvements have been made  since barbarism and cruelty, over an immeasurable period of time? I want you to feel me, while I'm busy imagining living in the present. また君のことが思い出された。 君のささやかな望み。 もちろん何でもないよ、そんなこと。 どうしてもっと多くのことを望まないのだろう。 欲張りじゃない、 ほんの少しの前進で満足する君にぼくは涙ぐむ。 どうしてだろう、いつもそうなのだ。 あまりに可憐で純粋すぎて、 君の思いがぼくの心を打つ。 ぼくが君を忘れて大きなことばかりに夢中になっている時、 躓いてうなだれる時、 君は不思議な顔をする。 これ以上望まない無欲ささえ気になっていないような 当たり前の暮らし。 それ...